Now available THE PROMISE and A TWIST OF FATE

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Back

I have to admit it, this winter is turning out to be the worst in my entire life. I thought I'd been smart by getting a flu shot and continue to take my vitamins, but nooooo. First I had a two-week battle with the flu and let me tell you, it took the first three rounds. Then three weeks later, boom! I'm knocked on my behind by bronchitis. This time, I went to the doctor, got an antibiotic i could have shared with a race horse and it was worse than the bronchitis. I'm not intending for a trifecta. So, to cheer me up, my sister-in-law sent me her advice to do some walking.

Here it is:

The Importance of Walking

Walking can add minutes to your life.
This enables you at 85 years old
to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
home at $7000 per month.

My grandpa started walking
five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he's 97 years old
and we don't know where he is.

I like long walks,
especially when they are taken
by people who annoy me.

The only reason I would take up walking
is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

I have to walk early in the morning,
before my brain figures out what I'm doing..

I joined a health club last year,
spent about 400 bucks.
Haven't lost a pound.
Apparently you have to go there.

Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

The advantage of exercising every day
is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, she looks good doesn't she.'

If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
start with a small country.

I know I got a lot of exercise
the last few years,......
just getting over the hill.

We all get heavier as we get older,
because there's a lot more information in our heads.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

AND

Every time I start thinking too much
about how I look,
I just find a Happy Hour
and by the time I leave,
I look just fine.

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