Thursday, January 24, 2013


By the time most people become adults, they have discovered
 that along with Murphy's Law that anything that could go wrong,
will, that there are certain laws of nature that will happen.
I have listed them:

1.Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become
coated with grease or grime, your nose will begin to itch
and you'll have to pee.

2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when
dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

3. Law of Probability- The probability of being watched
is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number,
you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.

5.Supermarket Law - As soon as you get in the shortest line,
the cashier will have to call for help.

6. Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the
one you were in will always move faster than the one you are
in now.

7.Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in
water, the telephone rings.

8. Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting
someone you know increases dramatically when you are
with someone you don't want to be seen with.

9. Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone
that a machine won't work, it will.

10. Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is
inversely proportional to the reach.

11.. Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any event,
the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always
arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats
several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who
leave early before the end of the performance or the game
is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move
once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the
bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are
very surly folk.

12. The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of
hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which
will last until the coffee is cold.

13. Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people
in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

14. Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-
faced jam sandwich landing face down on a floor, are
directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

15. Law of Logical Argument-Anything is possible if you
don't know what you are talking about.

16. Brown's Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes
fit, they're ugly.

17. Oliver's Law of Public SpeakingA closed mouth
gathers no feet.

18. Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy -As
soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop
making it.

19. Doctors' LawIf you don't feel well, make an appointment
to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better;
but don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick. The minute
you get your kid to the pediatrician, the kid is better.

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